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Man's Best Fiend/Transcript
Here's 21st episode for season 2 from'' Winnie the Pooh Goes Back at the Barnyard. Here's the Transcript. The Beginning (Scene opens up to a game of cards with greeting cards) * '''Abby:' Okay, show your greeting cards. * Pig: I got a pair of Get Well Soons’ and a Happy Secretary’s Day. * Pooh: 2 Easters and a National Honey Day * -Three It’s a girl and a pair of twins. * -I got two graduations and a Think Green Arbor Day. * Phineas: Luckily we got this giant Mom’s Birthday Card. * -Can’t beat this, 3 Christmas in July. * -Not so fast. 2 Chinese New Years and a Anniversary * Luan: I see your Chinese Year and raise you 3 April Fools and a National Pie Day * Otis: Ha, full house; Birthday, anniversary, sympathy, friendship, and Happy Bar Mitzvah step nephew. Come to papa. (Suddenly Duke comes in a wrecks the game while playing a ball) * Duke: Hey, guys. Check it out! I got a new ball. Alright come on. Who wants to play? Who wants to play? (Everyone else slowly walks off) * Duke: Oh geez doesn't anyone hear like to play ball? * Otis: You know, Ball is more of a dog game. * -Why don’t you ask Spike? * -He's at the groomer's today * Otis: Ok, how bout Lana. She human, but she does act like a dog. * -She's getting her shots again. * Otis: Goofy? * -Said he was taking on flying lesson. As a matter fact, DUCK!!! (Goofy comes in flying through the barnyard and into the well) * Otis: Why don’t you ask Everett? * Duke: Good idea! Hey, Everett, think fast! (throws it a Everett softly and he breaks apart) * Otis: Duke you need a doggy friend that isn’t getting clean, not in a well and with working bones. * Duke: Yeah, I know but it’s not like I can just tell the farmer, I want a doggy buddy. * Otis: (to the audience) Or can you? (Later answers the door and it was Otis as a dog whisper with a Spanish accent) * Otis: Hola senor. I am the pet whisper * Farmer: (shutters) What? * Otis: I SAID I AM THE PET WHISPER!! * Farmer: Oh. You mean the man from the tv who understand dog talk. * Otis: Ecactamente. I was on a soul searching walk about when I sense your dog was in great distressed * Farmer: Duke? Oh, he’s fine * Otis: If I may. (acts like Duke is speaking to him) He’s saying he is very lonely and wishes for a doggy friend to have the frolic and the playing and games and such. * Farmer: Really? I had no idea. I’ll go to the animal shelter right now. * Otis: Oh, oh. He also say the barn animals and children, eh they would enjoy a flat screen TV and a cable hook up * Farmer: Oh we don’t have time for that. My best friend needs a doggy plan. (heads for his truck and drives off) * Duke: Otis, it worked. How can I ever thank you. * Otis: Well you could stop sniffing my butt. * Duke: (to audience) Or can I? (A couple of minutes later, the farmer comes back) * Pip: Farmer’s back! * Peck: Oh, I wonder what kind of dog he got * Abby: Hey, maybe it’s a laberdoodle. * Freddy: Or a cockaterrier * Pig: Or a kangagator * Pip: Uh, those don’t exist. * Pig: Or don’t they? Marvis! You’re right they don’t. * Abby: The important thing is Duke’s gonna have a new friend. * Otis: And it’s all thanks to me * Farmer: Meet your new pal, Duke. You boys have fun. (leaves) * Duke: Hey, how’d you doing,fella? I’m Duke. Come out and say hi. (But as the dog comes out of the cage it turns out to be…) * Baxter: Well, Duncan, we meet again. * Duke: (screams like a girl) * Otis: Oh no, guys it’s Baxter. You remember Baxter. Baxter was that awful mutt who switched places with Duke at the vet and then tried to steal his life here at the barnyard. * Abby: Otis, we know. It was just a couple of weeks ago * Pig: Yeah, who are you, Professor Exposition? * Otis VO: Professor Exposition, explainer of things. He clarifies power points to explain away confusion. * Otis: No I am not he. * Pig: Then my search continues. * -Who's Baxter? * -He's a bad dog who once tried to take Duke's life before. * -Oh. The Middle * Baxter: What’s wrong, Derrick? You don’t look happy to see me. * Duke: The name’s Duke and you got five seconds to take a hike, Baxter, before I make you take it. * Otis: Yeah maybe you should beat it, lifestealer * Abby: Yeah, you got a lot of nerve coming back here. * Freddy: Yeah. * Peck: Some nerve * Pip: Identity thief. * Baxter: Fellas, fellas, you got me all wrong. Hey, the farmer picked me completely of his own free will; true story. (Flashback to the Oedeville Pet Shelter) * Baxter: (sees the farmer coming his way) Hey, guys, who wants whipped cream? (sprays it on 2 dogs to make it look like they have rabies) * Farmer: Uh, (sees Baxter) I’ll take that one. (Flashback ends) * Baxter: He chose out of thousands, Dorack. * Duke: It’s Duke. * Baxter: Duke, Jeremy, names aren’t important. What matter is I’ve changed. I’m out of the identity stealing game * Duke: Thanks, but I’ll find somebody else to play Ball with. * Baxter: Wait! Did you say Ball? I love Ball * Duke: You do? * Baxter: You kidding me? I’m all about Ball! I love more than life itself! * Duke: Well, any dog who likes Ball can’t be all bad. * Baxter: Sure, it’s all good. So what’ya say, Cheter, Skip, Alvin, Betty, Samathacresten? Can I stay? * Otis: Uh, Duke, I guess it’s up to you. * Duke: Oh, what the heck. * Baxter: Alright! Up top, don’t leave me hanging. Oh too slow for the dog show. Now let’s get our Ball on! * Abby: Oh look at them. They’re adorable together. * Pig: Make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. Though that could be the caterpillar I swallowed. * Caterpillar: It’s been 2 days since the giant pig monster ate me. Is this really happening or is it all some sort of terrible nightmare. * Narrator: 2 hours later…. * Duke: Phew, I haven’t played that much Ball in ages. Good times. * Baxter: Sure, we’re super tight best buds now. Hey, Derk, go long! (throws the ball at a lamp but Duke catches it) * Duke: Oh, Baxter, we never play Ball in the house; Farmer’s rules! * Baxter: Oh? Any rules against smashing lamps? (knocks the lamp out of Duke’s hand) (hears someone coming) The Farmer! (hides) * Farmer: (gasps) Bad Duke! Bad Duke! * Baxter: Oooo, you’re in trouble. (Later on Baxter gets Duke in more trouble like tearing up the Farmer’s hat, make mud prints all over his room, and put a stick of dynamite in the newspaper. Finally, the farmer sends Duke to the barn) * Farmer: Your not the dog I thought you were, Duke. From now on, you stay in the barn. (slams the door and leaves) * Otis: Duke, what happened? * Duke: That little mutt, Baxter, framed me so he can have the house to himself. (Everyone is shocked) * Baxter: Actually, it’s true. I play you like a cheap squeak toy. And there’s nothing you can do about it. * Otis: Nothing, really? Well, I don’t know, I’m sure we put our heads together we---GET HIM!!!! (Soon everyone chased Baxter) * Baxter: Oh, yes, chase me. I love Chase almost as I love Ball. Oh yeah, that’s right, I hate Ball. (heads towards the Farmer) * Farmer: Bad animals! Chasing a poor innocent puppy! Shame on you! (Baxter started licking him) Oh, kisses for Daddy. (heads inside) * Pip: I can’t believe that guy. * Duke: I know. Those should be my kisses for daddy. Did I just said that out loud. * Otis: Don’t worry Duke. We’ll get rid of Baxter somehow. * Duke: Nah, forget it, Otis. We gotta do what the farmer says. I’ll just move into the barn with you. * Otis: Sure, it’s not so bad really. (Everyone agrees) * Duke: And I won’t be any trouble. You’ll hardly know I’m there. (Later that night, Duke keeps everyone up with his howling) * Otis: Duke, could you keep it down? * Duke: I’m sorry, guys. Howling clears my sinuses. (gets a itch) Oh, oh, somebody scratch my back. The farmer always scratches my back. Nobody? Alright. I got it. I got it. (scratches himself on the floor) Well, back to my sinuses. (howls) Yeah, that’s better. (Howls) * Pip: Is there any way to keep him quiet?!?! * Freddy: (with a shovel) Way ahead of you. * Otis: Freddy! Come on, guys. Duke is off his routine. I’m sure in no time at all. * Duke: Oooh, I got another itch. (scratches himself) Oh, yeah. There it is. Hey, I’m fitting right in here, aren’t I? The Ending * Pip: (gets a call) Sup. It’s for you, Duke. * Duke: Me? (answers it) This is Duke. * Baxter: Hi, Deke, how’s the barn, not that I care. * Duke: Baxter you little-- * Baxter: Me? We’ll I’m having a swell time with the farmer, thanks for asking. We just finish watching Casablanca on TV * Duke: Casablanca? That’s our movie. * Baxter: And afterwards, he taught me how to balance a dog treat on my nose. * Duke: That’s our trick! * Baxter: Oh, by the bye, I’m sleeping in his bed now. Yeah, I guess you could say, I’m his new best friend. Oops, gotta go, time for my tummy rub * Duke: I’ll show that Baxter. I don’t need the farmer. I got all the friend I need right here. So, uh, who wants to de-worm me? (Everyone stood quiet for a sec) * Otis: Barn meeting! Guys, we can’t let Baxter get away with this. We gotta get him outta house and Duke back in; for all our sakes * Duke: But, Otis, Baxter set me up good. The farmer will never take me back * Otis: Oh, I think he would, if you save him from a man-eating bear! * Freddy: Oh, I like where this is going. * Duke: Well I don’t. * Otis: Relax, I won’t be a real bear. It’ll be me in a bear costume. Now the farmer takes Baxter out every afternoon for his walk * Freddy: Oh, I love that plan! * Otis: I haven’t said it yet. * Freddy: Now I’m confused (The next morning, the farmer takes Baxter for a run) * -(on walkie) Ok, they are on the move. * -Great just wait for the signal. (Suddenly, “Otis comes out as bear scaring the farmer) * Farmer: A bear! Get him boy! Get him! (suddenly Baxter started pushing the farmer towards the bear) What? Don’t! Stop! What are you doing? Bad dog, no! * Duke: Look at Otis, what a ham. Well I guess it showtime. (heads towards Otis) * -Go get him, Duke. * -This is almost to easy. * -Yeah, but you know something looks odd about Otis. * -What do you mean? * -It almost seems like that costume is too realistic. * -Now that you mention it, it does a bit real. * -Hey, guys. Otis just radio me telling me he's almost ready. * -Then that means-- * Piglet: Oh dear. * Tigger: Uh oh. * Rabbit: We gotta get down there as and back up, Duke or he'll get really hurt. (Dukes comes in, kicked, bites, and kung fu’d, Otis out right at the farmer feet) * Farmer: Duke, you saved my life! I’ve never should have kicked you out boy. Can you forgive me? (sees Baxter giving a sad look) And as for you, throw me to a bear. Bad dog! You’re going back to the shelter to find a new home. * Baxter: This isn’t over, Derwood. I’ll be back, you’ll see. And then we’ll…(yanked away) * -Duke, are you okay? * Duke: Course I am, why would I be? * -Well you see. * Duke: One sec, guys. They’re gone, Otis. You can get up now. Otis? * -Uh Duke, there’s something you should know about Otis. (Suddenly Otis comes out a bear) * Otis: Hey, Duke, where’s the farmer? * Duke: Oh, he just took Baxter back too---Hold up. If you’re there, then who's that? * -That’s what we were trying to tell you. * -You just beat and kung fu’d a real bear. * Bear: Round 2, sheep dog. * Duke: Wait I can explain. You see that other dog stole my identity in a previous episode and recently return to try it again. * Bear: Who are you, Professor Exposition? * Otis VO: Professor Exposition, explainer of things. He clarifies powerpoints to explain away confusion! * Duke: Who? (the bear smashes him in the ground and leaves) * Otis: You okay there, Duke? * Duke: Hey, my master loves me again. I am feeling no pain. Well, maybe a little pain. Actually, it’s quite intense. Now I’m blacking out. And, I’m out. (faints) (Later, the farmer plays Ball with Duke, as the gang watches from the window) * -Looks Duke and Farmer are happy again. * Sci-Twi: Yep, nothing for powerful than a love between dog and their human. * Spike the dog: Yeah. * Otis: Yep. Now there’s a sight that warms your heart. * Farmer: Kisses for Daddy. (Duke slobbers all over the farmer) * -What kind of sight is that? * Otis: And there’s a sight makes your heart puke. * Abby: Yeah, shut the window * Pig: Can’t unseen that * Pip: Gross * Freddy: Yuck. The End. Category:LegoKyle14 Category:Magmon47 Category:Winnie the Pooh goes Back at The Barnyard Season 2's Episodes Category:Scenes Category:Episodes Category:Transcripts